Wednesday, January 27, 2010
the last few days have been horrible....
when did i last blog?...oh ya...sat...
today is wed...and so many things have happened...
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SUNDAY:
went to church... then uncle called,
said they were coming over...so cleared the house...
they came, talked...went to JP with unni, maccu, alvin and shawn + mothers...
unni boyght black pants for work... then the boys bought food from mac and left with moms...
us gals ate there...talked abt india and so on...laughed alot abt "MOLLY".
came home,...they left.
called india and heard that my grandfather was very serious...
immediatetly pa decided to sent ma to india...booked ticket for monday!
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MONDAY:
early in e morn ma taught me how to prepare breakfast for pa n shawn.
went to boonlay place with ma to shop for her things to bring and also for shawn's camp...
came home...beena aunty came home...helped out to prepare lunch...
aunty left after papa came...shawn skipped math lsn to come home earlier...
got home...dressed...left for the airport...
sent her off... was sad...
that night, for the first time in our life shawn and i slept in a house without amma...
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k got to go now...ill update later...
2:14 AM
Saturday, January 23, 2010
" wad have u been doing the last few days sheenu?" somebody asked...
" this and that" i replied...
i played badmntn with nick n swee n chuachua n zn at gekpo...
went shopping with elizabeth in my indian kurtha top :P
watched "toothfairy" with a big grp...:)
played badntm with them again...
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pls dont continue reading if u are busy...
bcus u wond understand anything :S
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i didnt want to say this but i feel damn irritated and frustrated with that same person AGAiN!
his stinking attitude, his secretive glances, his irrational behavior!
he acts normal infront of others
>but pls im beta at observing behavioral changes
he might be able to convince others that hes as usual
but ive known him long enuf to know hes not!
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and surprisingly im not reacting...
i dont know wad to do....get angry with him?...but angry for wad?
get upset?...but upset over wad?
wadeva i do i will be e one being irrational :X
i cant react...atleast until i know his motive...
yea...thats what i dont understand...WHY?
why is he behaving like this?
have i in anyway treated him badly?
have i hid anything from him?
or is there smt going on behind my back?
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for now i have no choice but to resist...
to be patient and take all the mental torture calmly....
to ignore and be ignored...
7:36 PM
Friday, January 15, 2010
had loads of fun today...it was a last min arrangement...but still...
i had to answer almost 30 smses while i was taking my shower...haha...
atleast 10 when i was shampooin my hair...:)
shopping was quite ok...i just had to buy a wallet...
we went to kfc after that...
while eating we discussed abt various ODD ppl we knew...
hahaha...OMG...laughing was good enuf to fill empty stomachs......
seriously...i think this is the first time im laughing this much after returning from india...
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after that we met nankai at e sports shop...he bought a new bdmtn racket...
went to shorts stadium...met sweeswee...
ooo...i was so scared to play with him (the sporty one!)
but it was ok...he promised to play light on me...hehe
then played doubles, me wif nick and swee wif nankai...for almost an hour...
stopped shortly after fauzi came...
then they played with mel...irene didnt even touch the racket...
i said tha birds(shuttlecocks) were suffering...then...
nick accidentally said that it was his bird!,...
and OMg...it took a few seconds for him to realize why we were laughing...
crazy nick...i thought his backbone wud break while playing...
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hehe...then went to 711...to buy drinks...
i decided that lemon cafe (e store beside 711)needed to be visited ....
after scanning thru e prices @ 711...they suck blood thru ur wallet man!
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then wanted to go to nick's house...but mom didnt allow...
so went home with mel...
on the bus mel told me abt someone and i am sososos disgusted with that person!
got home...sat infront of the com...and here i am now...
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on the lift...i cudnt help thinking of, well thinking abt everything...
today i laughed my heart out...with ppl i call my frends...
with ppl i know i can trust...ppl i can gossip to...ppl i can cry infront of and not feel ashamed...
what am i doing?...i have found ppl i can lay my heart down to...
but then why am i leaving?
do i think i can find frends beta than them?....
even if i do...in how long?
even if i do...wud they be as caring?
will they be as frank?
what if im making a mistake???...the first mistake of my life...
just like Govind from "the 3 mistakes of my life"?...
i fear regret...i fear self-sympathy...
i fear falling behind when it comes to relationships...
by making the same mistakes that ppl around me made?...
papa once told me...
"there are 2 type of ppl in this world...the relationship orientated and the result driven"
he stopped there...scanning me...i knew he was waiting for a reply...
which type was i? thats what he wanted to know...
thats exactly what i didnt know...
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1:16 AM
Monday, January 11, 2010
i dont really know how to put this but im happy with my results....
even though i didnt do well in my fav subject!...
i mean bio...
i did horribly well for humns and eng...when i was so sure that i wud fail for them....
physics...i was ecpecting the C...so B3 was so ok...
chem...A2 was more than enuf...
but bio became a B3...i was hopping for A2....
and eng!!! i got an A2 for eng!!!!....i bet even god cant believe it....
and even more shocking!...i got A1 for humns!!!!
im more than happy.....A1 for Emath and A2 for Amath....
total L1R5: 11....
im happy...
but like i said...nobody else is...
my mom keeps comparing..."that gal we met ter..."
my dad keeps adjusting, "if u had this much ...", "if u had that much..."
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but then...like wad vindu said...parents are never too happy....
im happy with it...so y shud others be bothered...
im probably going to papa's sch...JJC...
haha...its going to be so funny...
but im not going to get the sub comb that i want...
wadeva...
6:32 PM
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
my white dog...titu
my black dog ...tiki
me n my family...at iduki.JPG)
me n cousin sis...nimmy
with bro n anju in a forest in calicut
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my holidays were as great as usual...
didnt want to come back...
the sadness on my grandparetns and dogs faces was just too much to take...
i cudnt stop myself wen tears filled my eyes...
the tears evaporated super fast due to the high temperature there...
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the plane ride was too tiring...
the food they serve was actually good compared to the earlier flights....
got home yesterday morn... everyone fell asleep...i just cudnt...
smsed friends ...got the know the horrible news that results were to be released next week!!!...
i thought i had a mnt to waste!...
wanted to go movie watching with mel and nick...but jet-lag beat me...
in the evenin..went to church with mom...
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today was pa's n ma's 18th wedding anniversery...
ma bought roses for papa and he bought her box of chocolates and a pair of earings...hehehe...
so sweet...
shawn had to go too..
i wonder how he likes his new class...
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10:06 PM
Monday, November 30, 2009
yesterday was good...
i have not had so much fun for a long time...
10am badminton till 1145...we played for 45mins free...
passed irene the hug-me bear...
then snackers lunch at KFC...then to irene's house...
irene's mom's perfume smelt of one of our teachers...but no one could identify her...
then we headed for civil servants club to bowl!
we played 2 games...was really nice!...
then went to westmall bcus shihong wanted to buy smt...
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got home by 430..
thats when everything changed...
papa was stressed out bcus of work...
mama was too irritated by all the packing....
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hia...i cant wait to get to india...
4:39 PM
Friday, November 27, 2009
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i wanted to blog everyday, apparently its not as easy as i thought it would be...
prom night (25th Nov @ Carlton Hotel) was really good...the dress...well it was abit toooo low! surprisingly my mom thought it was not that bad...
the program was great until some idiots decided to put my name for the prom queen nomination form! ok theres a reason why i dont want my name to be there...(cant tell u) but the thing is...there are so many other girls there then why choose my name huh??? obviously to humiliate and irritate me right!
...naa im not angry with anyone...though i did get cross with my parents...they came 30 mins too early and kept calling me...parents :)...
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this prom really showed me something...people around you dont really like u for who you are...but for who u act to be....
i am naturally over-reactive to everything...given fact...
and ppl just hate that...hey dont give me that weird look to tell me im being over...i know i am...
this is my world...i'll be who i want to be...
at this point i also know that most of these ppl arent going to be my friends
if not for this badminton with them then i think i wond even sms anymore...
even if im gonna study in Singapore..i dont think these ppl will even say hi! like what Mel said abt her primary school friend ...i have a simillar story yaar...so why mention...
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i feel scared...insecure...alone...
im leaving this place...(hopefully) but whats there for me...
isomething tells me that this years trip to india is gonna be horibble!...reasons:
1)papa isnt helping...he makes everything worse...
2) shawns not gonna entertain me too long bcus of his hunting plans...
3)Cs wond be there till the end of the trip...i'll be bored till then...
4) i dont have anymore homework to worry about...
5) finding a good school for me is not gonna be easy...especially for me...
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hey if i find this trip to be too negative then im gonna be lost for ever!
u know lost in the sense: depressed...insensitive...indifferent...pale...like anyother suicidal...
im serious!...even now if anyone could actually step into my heart and check the temperature, i think u'll understand the urgency for this trip to india! my life depends on it!!!
my life....
4:28 PM
had loads of fun today...
my white dog...titu
my black dog ...tiki
me n my family...at iduki.JPG)
me n cousin sis...nimmy
